come on shepherds!?! come on, Paul!?!

I have a special concern for you church leaders. I know what it's like to be a leader, in on Christ's sufferings as well as the coming glory. Here's my concern: that you care for God's flock with all the diligence of a shepherd. Not because you have to, but because you want to please God. Not calculating what you can get out of it, but acting spontaneously. Not bossily telling others what to do, but tenderly showing them the way. When God, who is the best shepherd of all, comes out in the open with his rule, he'll see that you've done it right and commend you lavishly. (1 Peter 5:1-4, The Message)

Sounds like the bishop's exhortation during my ordination vows! I think also of James' warning that "not many of you should presume to be teachers, my brothers and sisters, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly." (James 3:1, TNIV)

What is such a challenge (at once refreshing and at once daunting) in this passage is the call to serve with a diligent and determined focus. The challenge is to BE the shepherd in a world that is seducing us all to BE a thousand different personas. The shepherd is focussed not on obligation (v2), nor wealth (v2), nor power. Rather, the shepherd is focussed on Jesus Christ, the "best shepherd of all" (or "uber-shepherd"). By choosing a diligent and determined focus on Jesus (think Hebrews 12:1-3) the local shepherd will be (super)naturally directed to a diligent and determined service to the sheep.

O Lord Jesus, your local parishes NEED shepherds who will serve with such a focus. If they did (if I did) I can only imagine the "mighty deeds" that the local church would become part of.

a question of rotten fruit

"Produce fruit in keeping with repentance...I baptize you with water. But one more powerful that I will come, the thongs of whose sandals I am not worthy to untie. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire." - John the Baptizer (Luke 3:8, 16)

I would never describe myself as a pentecostal, nor as an anabaptist, BUT at times I really have trouble with the concept of baptismal regeneration. Clearly not doing the historic debate sufficient justice by summing up in one sentence, I stand ready to be reprimanded (but here goes):

Baptismal Regeneration is the belief that the sacrament of baptism in and of itself is effective in regenerating a person from sin and death to new life in Christ. sola baptisma!

The strength of this position is that it rightly emphasizes that salvation is solely in God's hands and does not require anything from us (we just receive it). The weakness is that it can so easily become formalism that is divorced from personal and active faith and obedience.

Now, here I have to state that my concern here is NOT surrounding a theology of baptism (infants or believers? sprinkling or immersion?). My concern, rather, is why so many Christians don't look anything like what Jesus' taught and demonstrated. Why does the Church look so pagan most of the time. Why do we spend our money, rent DVDs, treat others, and spend our free time almost identically to the pagan world? Where is the fruit of our repentance?

For me, today (who knows what my answer will be tomorrow), the answer is in the Holy Spirit and fire that Jesus brings to our baptisms. Without denying or embracing the doctrine of baptismal regeneration, is it possible to say that most of us are capable of quenching the Spirit (1Thess 5:19)? Do I seek to embrace the gift of (purifying and transforming) fire and (empowering and guiding) Holy Spirit that Jesus brings to the baptismal waters? Or do I spend most of my life running away from the fire and Holy Spirit? Do I, instead, embrace my brokeness (a la Oprah's advice) and seek to be my own source of power and my own tour guide through life? Wow, that sounds like the self-help section at Chapters!

Is the fruit missing because I keep pushing away the gardener and keep refusing to be pruned?

Learning to See, Learning to Be Honest

Peter’s 3-fold denial (I’m reading Mar 14 right now) connects with my story WAY too closely. How often in my life do I simply tell people what they want to hear so as to avoid confrontation? I have done this with my bosses for my entire life it seems. Whether at my present position or when speaking with bishops or archdeacons or even peers…I so often do not share my true mind.

Where did this come from? Well, the Shakespearean advice (from Polonius to Laertes in Hamlet) is to “give every man thy ear, but few thy voice.” And my own father has quoted those very words to me many times. The Biblical equivalent is (James 1:19-20) “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because our anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.”

However, is James telling us to be slow to speak out of self-preservation (ie. avoiding conflict) or out of care for others? In the context of the passage, it seems to clearly be the latter. James is warning against angry, hateful, and damaging speech. What James is not advising, though, is to bottle up our convictions and never share them. To bottle up our convictions is to become double-minded – a concept that James twice renounces in his epistle (James 1:8 and 4:8).

So, what is the way forward? How can I learn to avoid my double-mindedness, while at the same time avoiding becoming a person who does speak but in anger?

Perhaps the call is to see each person as redeemable by God. The call is to see (as Darrell Johnson once said to me) Jesus as the final goal (the telos in Greek) for each person on earth. If I really saw people that way, perhaps I would be able to care “that much” about them to not be willing to lie to anyone. I would care enough and see them in such a way (as redeemable in Jesus) that I would have to share my heart with them. And finally, because of all of this, it goes without saying that such heart-sharing must be done with humility, love, compassion, patience, and grace. O Lord, help me to learn to see this way and to speak accordingly! O Lord, today!

Why Do I Get So Mad?

Anger is a stange thing -- sometimes exhilarating (when we feel justified) but so often horribly embarrassing. I am confronted by my own anger more often that I would like to admit on public cyberspace. As John 3:20 says, "All those who do evil hate the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed." (TNIV) So, perhaps raising the anger issue here is part of my personal journey of living more "in the light."

The interesting thing about anger is how it is so often not about the person I direct it to. My anger, so much of it, should be directed at myself. Now, I'm not a psychologist (nor even a good counselor), but I imagine that this has a lot to do with self-preservation. Yet it is ironic that an "unhealthy" person would take their anger out on themselves (eg. self-mutilation) but a "healthier" person takes it out on others. !?! So, instead of getting mad at myself -- for my lack of inertia, poor choices, wasted opportunities -- I lash out at my kids, or my wife, or my boss (behind closed doors, of course...self-preservation again).

I suppose the healing needed is available in the most traditional and "simple" of ways: I need to talk to the Lord more about what makes me angry. I need to feel the freedom in my prayer-life to open up to the Lord about the ways that I have failed instead of letting those feelings fester into anger. And in that safe place, I need to hear the comforting, challenging, and redemptive words of my Saviour: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:28-30, TNIV)